David Tian – Rock Solid Relationships
Salepage: David Tian – Rock Solid Relationships
Rock Solid Relationships is intense psychologically. David’s goal is to provoke you with hard facts about your upbringing, your attachment styles, your masculine energy, and your failed relationships while dating.
This course is from an ex-pickup artist. If you’ve been in this lifestyle and are longing for a long-term relationship, he knows the language and what to say to convince you to change your methods to find love, significance and connection.
The program is divided into 10 modules of around 3 to 4 hours each, with 6 half-hour meditations, which adds to 40 hours. This is a full week’s work from a relationship coach.
How Does Rock Solid Relationships Work?
Module 1 – Needs and Rules
In this module, you will do a little homework to find your needs and put them in order of importance in your life. If this is your first time thinking about your life from an outside perspective, this will feel weird and new age, but it’s worth it.
If you’ve done this a couple of times before, this can guide you through another recap and plan of your life, based on psychology.
You’ll first learn how your 7 basic human needs are prioritized (security, variety, significance, connection, love, growth, contributions). Then, you will create rules about how to meet them appropriately.
I learned that when needs are prioritized in the wrong order it can alter your fulfillment. For example, if the need for significance comes before the need for love, you probably think you can only be loved if you are significant, successful, handsome, strong, and have material success. You will then look needy to women if they are required to fulfill your significance, your variety or your security.
David will teach you the way to rearrange your needs hierarchy. If you’re in a relationship, you will also answer questions about what your woman needs, and how you are fulfilling them for her.
Module 2 – Your Masculine Leadership
In this module David will describe the unconscious mind using masculine symbols like the warrior, the magician, the lover, and the king. You will learn how they manifest in your life, and most importantly, how their immature counterparts influence your relationships.
There will be hard questions about your childhood coming, like “Who did you grow up to please? What were your roles in this relationship? Who could you not be as a child? What part of you did you have to disown?” David will help interpret the answers, and how this dynamic unconsciously interfered with your love life.
The meditation of this module will get the warrior in you screaming in your living room, so be sure you are alone!
Module 3 – Your Rock Solid Love
In module 3 David gets very intellectual. He will explain some psychological theory of modern love life, with movie characters as examples. This was my favorite part, as my day job is in a mental health hospital. I understood clearly what he meant the first time, and it was deep and meaningful, wise stuff you learn when you have experience with people’s minds, but not obvious for novices.
He explains in detail certain types of co-dependent couples, like the fixer with the predator, and the nice guy with the manic pixie dream girl. For example, predators and fixers end up together in a relationship that can’t work long term, because they are perfect in a dysfunctional way: the fixer gives without taking and the predator takes without giving.
He also gives a critique of the pickup artist’s lifestyle, and why it fails and messes with people’s minds.
This quote, among many, is a meaningful conclusion of this module: “If I can find the type of person I picture my false, idealized self being with and make them my real-life partner, that would be the final proof I need that my false, idealized self is in fact the real me.”
Module 4 – Masculine Freedom
In this module, David goes deeper and further into your past when you were 2-3 years old. He explains concepts you’d learn in graduate studies in psychology, like defense mechanisms and toxic shame, so you understand the vocabulary and the exercises of later modules.
As kids, we learned to either achieve or please to survive, and as we adapted, we developed certain parts of us. “How did you adapt in order to meet your basic needs?”
David argues that all of human psychological suffering comes from shame at some point, but I don’t understand the difference between what he describes as shaming and simply growing up and learning about life.
The meditation in this module is interesting. It starts with an example of 2 people living the same event, but who experienced different meaning from it: life is short, experience everything fully vs life is hard, don’t connect with anyone to prevent suffering. Then, you will be guided in your earliest memories to uncover a meaning about your life, actionable right now.
Module 5 – Your Rock Solid Attachment
This is a revealing module. You will do the attachment style test and listen to David explain how it manifests in dating and relationships. You will also do it with a woman in mind to explore how a woman’s attachment style impacts your relationships. This is a very unique and useful skill to master.
You will also be asked to revisit your past relationships to understand why they happened and why they broke. The final question of the chapter is a good view of the personal work you will do: “What are the main attachment principles involved in your relationships, and how can you reprogram your working model with effective strategies?”
Module 6 – Your Masculine Assertiveness
In this module, you will learn to understand the difference between what you should or have to do, from what you really want. Then you’ll see different techniques of assertiveness like negotiating compromise, rolling with the punches and owning your mistakes.
These communication skills are basic but essential to practice in all areas of your life.
Module 7 – Your Rock Solid Vitality
Here, David explains again how your relationship with your parents can shape how you interact with others. For example, even if your parents were well-meaning with their affection and proper discipline, this could’ve been only to validate themselves as parents.
David appropriately suggests counseling if a user fits the description given of abuse and neglect.
This module can be redundant for some users in need of practicality by this point in the program. There is no meditation in this module.
Module 8 – Your Masculine Power
This module is all about testosterone and how to boost it in your daily life. The proposed habits are common sense, and are proven to be effective. Experienced users will probably find this module redundant, but a course about masculinity would be incomplete without this section. The meditation of this module will tap your dark side, the warrior king, and it’s fun.
David also discusses how to foster and keep all kinds of relationships, from booty calls to long-term multiple relationships. So if the standard long-term monogamous relationship doesn’t appeal to you, this module will help you explore some alternatives.
Module 9 – Your Rock Solid Relationship
This module is about negotiating in relationships. It’s in the form of a 3-hour long keynote in audio form, without PDFs. David teaches a method to calculate the value each partner must invest and receive to stay in a relationship.
It seems like a cold monopoly game, but it could help some men with serious problems of negotiation. David gives a complete example of growing complexity of a couple negotiating taking out the trash, doing the dishes, and cuddling time, with the objective of a win-win situation.
Module 10 – Your Masculine Mastery
The last module talks about sexual problems and a healthy sex life. David mentions a couple of herbal supplements to help with erectile dysfunction, but they are not scientifically proven. Of course, a good strategy to prevent sexual problems is to have a healthy lifestyle.
The section about sexual psychology could be helpful for men who’ve never had a deep commitment. You’ll learn that emotions are more important than techniques for a healthy long-term sex life, and that it’s important to value your own sexuality, not putting getting sex from her as a finality. Unfortunately, this final module won’t be as useful for sexually experienced guys.
David also talks about dominance, presence, immersion, and lust. It all seems common sense. He does not focus on specific techniques, although he will talk about them in a basic way. The concept of immersion is interesting: don’t think too much in the bedroom and stay present.
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