For this training program, I stepped back. Way back and thought about all-new models of psychology for this one, then I STARTED FROM SCRATCH in designing it.
It’s powerful. It is the latest of the latest in my overall strategies and tactics of BEING A MAN, and will be material you can IMMEDIATELY go out and use in your life. And while it can be applied to two different areas of life – WOMEN and WORK – if you came to this page possibly wondering about something deeper than either area of life as a man something that has more to do with ALL OF IT – your overall experience of who you are, how people treat you, and how you treat yourself with respect, or lack of it. Your sense of pride, your sense of shame, your sense of permission to be who you want to be, say what you really feel and do what you feel is right.
But something holds you back from really living with this sense of freedom that you see some other men enjoy. You know, the guys who seem to “shoot their mouths off” and yet never get in trouble for it. The guys who seem to always say the right things to women to get their interest, even if what they say is a bit “off color” or “inappropriate.” They seem to change jobs with ease, and make friends even easier. And part of you is jealous of them because you know that deep down, although you want to be as free as they are to be themselves, you just can’t. It might “rock the boat” at work, or in your relationship or marriage, or cause your family to criticize you.
But you sense that these other men are somehow better men than you.
And you wonder, or wish, or hope that it doesn’t have to be that way – you, as the “outsider” on life, on really “feeling alive.”
You might even give these men a name: “alpha males.”
If you know how to look, you’ll see that your voice, your identity, and your sense of individuality was there all along, waiting for you to have the insight to recognize it, the self-respect to know you’re worth taking on the role as a man you know you could be, and the will to care enough to take charge of the responsibility, devotion, discipline, and passion to handle that.
To the ancients, this was a status for a man to ritually enter, to be mentored at, guided, taught, and then celebrated for reaching. It was called “initiation,” and they held “initiation rituals.”
A boy was taken out into the wilderness and set loose to find his way home, to hunt and kill an animal as a trophy, or to compete with other boys in a battle to what seemed like it could be to the death but never was really, because their fathers were secretly watching, guiding, and protecting.
This “facing the fear of death” though – it did something remarkable, even though it was a bit of a prank played on them, a fatherly strategy for the sake of making their boys into men the only way in fact to do so, because in facing the fear of death and looking down at their bodies to discover that yes, they had survived the trial what else could they fear in life, having beat the fear of death?
You see, they were then free to live the lives of MEN.